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Shakin’ up my Soul

March 31, 2009

Last week I did something a little crazy in the interest of preserving my sanity.  I won’t tell you what, but I will tell you it was definitely a good decision.  I’m slowly but surely finding my equilibrium again, and it feels fantastic.

But setting my head squarely back on my shoulders led to something that shouldn’t have been such the realization it was this morning.

I wanna fall in love.

I could bust into about fifteen different songs right now, new and old, and each of them would be entirely appropriate- but I’ll spare you.

The difference between this feeling and the feeling I’ve been feeling lately (how many times can I say feeling in one blog post? How about one sentence?) is that this is not one of loneliness and desperation.  It is one of excitement and anticipation.

Everything’s better when there’s someone to share it with.

My life isn’t perfect.  My life isn’t a fairytale.  I am probably not living up to my greatest potential at this present moment in time.

But… my life really isn’t bad.  It’s pretty good, actually.  I don’t need a significant other to be okay, to be satisfied, to be happy.  But to have someone to share the okay moments, the satisfaction, the happiness?

I’m just excited to feel that.

Someday.
Soon.

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. March 31, 2009 1:22 pm

    That feeling of excited anticipation is SO great! Especially when you are self-aware like you are, and you know it’s not about codependency or being lonely, but about sharing your life because you KNOW it’s worth sharing. I was just beginning to recognize the same sort of feeling within weeks of meeting the love of my life (now fiance!) — so yeah, I’d be willing to bet that it’s coming soon for you, too! :-)

  2. March 31, 2009 2:21 pm

    i’m going to go out on a limb and say… lila mccann? if that’s the song i’m thinking it is, we are soulmates. no lie.

    and courtney? you’ll fall in love and when you do? it’s going to be EPIC.

  3. Kendall permalink
    March 31, 2009 3:50 pm

    I think about the experiences I have when I’m on my own and those I share with the girlfriend. The memories are so much more vivid. I still get a little giddy with her.

    Things are always better when you share them.

  4. March 31, 2009 9:18 pm

    :)

    good for you sweetie. We need to talk again sometime. I miss you.

  5. Just Playing Pretend permalink
    April 1, 2009 12:08 am

    Falling in love. sigh.

  6. April 1, 2009 7:58 pm

    I’m with you on that. I love my independence but I’m looking forward to sharing and hanging and loving.

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