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More Details to Come

August 20, 2009

I don’t get to church very often anymore because I generally work through the entire weekend.  That’s not really an excuse because this is Tennessee and nothing BUT the churches are open for business on Sunday mornings, but listen, I’m not getting up in time to be at church by 8:30 because that’s the only service that will allow me to also get to work on time.  I don’t know if you know this about me, but Waking Up and I do not get along so well.

Still, every now and then I get a Sunday off, or I get a shift that starts just late enough to allow a comfortable amount of time to make it from church to work without breaking out into a cold sweat (I’m not a terribly punctual person, except when it comes to work.  I guess if there was one case in which to let that instinct kick in, that would be the one).  Sometimes, even then, I don’t make it.

Look, I consider myself a Catholic girl, but I doubt the Pope would see it that way.  Hey, Pope, whatcha gonna do about it?

The point I’m trying to get to here is that I just know when it’s time for me to go.  I hate to say that sometimes I feel called because all of the crazy Christian phraseology gets under my skin and irritates the living daylight out of me, but for lack of a better way to say it, sometimes I just feel called to be there.

Ew.

Sorry.

And the last time I ended up at church was a little less than a month ago, listening to the story of Jesus turning a few loaves of bread and a few fish into enough food for thousands and thousands of people.

Two things I got from that:

Sharing what little you have can definitely make more impact than you’d ever expect.

God will provide.

I haven’t been back to church since, not because I disagree but because I couldn’t agree more.  I’m still filled up with this particular message, still focused on it, still finding it to be terribly relevant to all that I’m doing and thinking and trying to believe in.  And I get that going back and hearing another story won’t change that, but… I don’t know.  I don’t know what exactly I think will happen, but I’m quite content to thrive on these thoughts for now.

I look back on the last few months and while I certainly acknowledge all of the help my parents have given me, I’m still not sure how all of my bills have gotten paid, how I managed to make it to Chicago and stick EXACTLY to my budget, pretty much down to the last penny, how I’m sitting here in front of this computer sucking down a Micky D’s sweet tea and not feeling terribly guilty about having handed over my check card for fast food, albeit very cheap fast food.  There are weeks when I look at my schedule and pull the calculator out and start figuring out how much I’ll be able to spend on groceries if I’m really careful about how much I drive until the next paycheck– and by the end of the week I’ll look and what I’ve actually worked and breathe a deep sigh of relief, realizing I’ve picked up more than enough hours and not even realizing how it happened.

But then there are days like today when I’m not at work even though I was originally scheduled to be, which obviously frightens me because those are hours I’m not getting paid for, but it all works out rather nicely anyway because I end up in another place I was really supposed to be.

And all of this is to say that a project I started a month, maybe two ago, but have been thinking and dreaming about for much longer than that, is finally getting its big start.

Tomorrow I’ll officially be a music teacher.

I’m getting paid and everything.

And the ball has just started rolling.

I’m confident.

Because God has provided.
It’s the only explanation.

And He’ll continue to do so.

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8 Comments leave one →
  1. August 20, 2009 7:25 pm

    Congrats!!! That’s so awesome that you get to teach music, I’m sure whoever you’re teaching will learn a lot :)

    God always provides in the end… and sometimes that’s the only thing that keeps me going.

  2. August 20, 2009 8:24 pm

    Wow, congrats.

  3. August 20, 2009 11:26 pm

    Congratulations! Exciting!

  4. Shelley permalink
    August 21, 2009 7:25 am

    You’re going to love teaching, I know it. Congrats!

    My return to church was the same weekend as yours. I wouldn’t say I felt the call so much as the need to pay God back for everything that he has provided me with lately. Either way, I’m glad I’m going more regularly.

  5. August 21, 2009 9:22 am

    Congratulations and good luck! That’s so exciting!

  6. akalei permalink
    August 21, 2009 10:35 am

    Congratulations Girl! I am so excited for you, and hope you all the best of luck!

  7. cari permalink
    August 22, 2009 11:00 am

    hooray. that is SO exciting.

    and seriously, lately i have been getting crazy urges to simply go sit in a catholic church. do we actually HAVE cathedrals in fargo? is that just what they’re called? i don’t know. but part of me has been needing something like that. and maybe, just maybe sometime soon i’ll get a chance to do that. to simply sit. and focus. and read. and rest. i just want to rest.

  8. August 23, 2009 10:54 pm

    So remember that one time we were frolicking down the hallway of that hotel in Havre…you know- that one across from the duck in where the vests of the servers looked like bad curtains… yeah- i thought I would remind you in case you forgot cuz this post totally reminded me to remind you even though there is absolutely nothing relevant to it in your post. o…and i told you i was going to leave you this comment :) I LOVE YOU!!

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