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A Good Cry

November 9, 2009

Last night fatigue was catching up with not just my body but with my brain. I was supposed to have the entire weekend off to be mindless, to shut down for just a little while, to recoup. From what? I don’t know. Life, I guess.

But I ended up picking up an extra shift for yesterday, and when Saturday rolled around and I stumbled across a job opening I absolutely couldn’t pass up, I went to work with resume revisions and other miscellaneous tasks, and ended up with no weekend at all.

Which is fine, in a way. I have to use my motivation when I’ve got it.

But that left me feeling cloudy and plain old out of it yesterday. I came home and tried to work on a few more things but couldn’t focus for much longer than a minute or two. Honestly, that’s hard for me all the time, but it’s not something I can’t fight through. Last night? Impossible.

So I decided I’d take what was left of my weekend, I’d curl up on the couch with a pillow and a blanket, and I’d watch My Girl.

That wasn’t the original plan, My Girl, but I’ve seen most of my movies so many times, and most fairly recently, that I’ve got them nearly memorized. My Girl is on VHS, so I tend to forget about it.

So I popped it in, purely because it was the only movie I wouldn’t be able to recite the first 34 minutes of perfectly, and I zoned in, tuning everything else out.

I knew I’d cry. I always do. Usually it’s around the time Vada runs in during Thomas J’s funeral and yells, “He can’t see without his glasses!” Oh. my. heart.

It breaks every time.

But I found myself crying long before that, this time. I don’t even remember what it was that made me cry the first time, but when I looked at the time and realized I wasn’t even halfway into the movie? Wow. I knew I was in for a long two hours.

My roommate came out of her room at one point to ask if she could turn off the kitchen light because it was keeping her up and I was bawling like a baby and basically just had to sniffle and nod and croak out a “suuuUUUUURrrre.”

So I finished the movie and I wiped the tears from pretty much MY ENTIRE FACE and ran to grab a tissue to blow my nose.

And then I realized something.
I was AWAKE.

I don’t know what I needed to cry about, but I guess maybe it doesn’t matter. Maybe I just needed to.

I feel so much better now.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. November 9, 2009 9:53 am

    Sometimes, women just cry to feel better and men will never understand that.

  2. tabithablogs permalink
    November 9, 2009 7:37 pm

    Um, yeah. I saw your tweet last night about that line from My Girl, and I teared up just THINKING about it.

  3. November 9, 2009 10:55 pm

    Yep. Sometimes, for some reason, girls just need a good boo hoo. <3

  4. mary evelyn permalink
    November 12, 2009 11:09 am

    As much as I hate to cry, sometimes it’s absolutely necessary. You feel a sense of relief when you’re done; a little lighter perhaps.

    I love that movie too, and it’s a sure cry for me :o)

  5. cari permalink
    November 16, 2009 4:11 pm

    sometimes you just need one. really. i know. i’m not much of a crier, but sometimes you just need it.

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